Series 1989: January 2017

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." Ephesians 6:10-12

1. It won’t end well.

A relationship is often likened to a tree that will grow strong, take root and spread its branches. When two people get together, naturally they will think of marriage, buying a house and having kids to form a family. But when you’re a third party – essentially you’re throwing the original couple’s plans in disarray. (She has no respect!) Think about it, the gf/wife when she finds out, is going to definitely hate you. Whether or not she hates her bf/husband. This is because you ruined their relationship by accepting to be the third party.

2. You will have the reputation of being the slut / home wrecker.

If you decide to be the third party, while in full knowledge that the guy is attached, basically you’re consciously just throwing your reputation down the drain. Usually the first thing people will remember about you is how you shamelessly agree to be the third party. Everyone will agree that the cheating guy is a bastard but if you accept a relationship with the bastard, knowing he is behaving as one, then you have no defense and is putting women around the world to shame for behaving this way.

3. You deserve a better guy or you deserve the one you leave behind

Seriously. Maybe women who accepts the role of the third party do so because they are afraid that they can’t find a better guy. I’m telling you right now that your value and worth is not based on some guy’s affection for you. If you believe in Christ – your value and worth is based on your identity in Christ as a precious child of God. If you don’t believe in Christ – your value and worth exists because your parents bore and raised you – definitely not for you to be the third party. And if you have sucky parents, your value and worth comes from within – from how YOU define it, not how others perceive you to be, ok? Go tell that guy to fly a kite because you deserve someone better than him, someone who can devote his entire heart to you.

4. Your relationship can’t see the light of day.

He probably deletes every message / whatsapp after you send them incase his gf sees it. He probably dates you to neighborhood coffee shops where no one will see the both of you hanging out. You want to go out to Orchard to shop and watch a movie, visit Gardens by the Bay but he is probably too cowardly and scared that people might recognize him with you and find out about his cheating. A healthy relationship is one where there is no hiding, you don’t have to nor should you be afraid of people seeing you two together. If the guy is afraid to bring you out to crowded places – with the exception that he is some super hot star – do yourself a favour, drop him like a hotcake, please.

5. You won’t be his one devotion.

You already know he has a gf/wife and chances are, you are second place. I hope you won’t fall for the “I am with her but my heart is with you”.

6. You will cheapen yourself.

Humans will only treasure what they fought hard to get. When you fall into the third party place, the guy is unlikely to treat you like a hard earned precious pearl since he ain’t going to give you the full treatment that’s reserved for his main gf/wife – wedding banquet and all. Imagine that, just imagine that.

7. If he meant to break up with his gf/wife, he would have done so already.

If he claims that he will break up when “the time is right”, please don’t be so naive. He will not break up. He is leading you on and you will be the fool if you follow him.

What should you do?

1. Tell him to stop contacting you or stop flirting with you because you respect him, his gf / wife.

2. Move on in life – surround yourself with trustworthy friends of both sexes who will introduce you friends who are trustworthy too.

3. Don’t feel guilty about his lecherous feelings for you.

4. Just be direct and ask “Are you single or attached?” before you agree to go on dates in future. If he says attached and still asking you out – tell him to bring his gf/wife along and basically don’t waste your time on him any longer.

And lastly, since you are older than me by few years you should know this already and have the common sense to do all of the above.

Source: https://enabalista.com/2015/01/03/why-you-shouldnt-be-the-third-party-in-a-relationship/

Nothing beats the companion of having a pet. Growing up I have always wanted a dog of my own, however my parents wouldn't let me because my mom is allergic to furry animals. So I gave up on having my own dog. Instead, I comforted myself by playing with other people's dog.

Potchi came to me during a difficult time in my life. She was given to me by my uncle to love and to care for. And I can't ask for a better friend. She has been a whirlwind, a frustrations and full love pack in her tiny little body.

Potchi the Miniature Pinscher

I have read everything about her breed, dog care and grooming. I can say I did very well indeed. She has been my sunshine, my stress reliever and bed-mate. love the way she jumps whenever I came come and the way she shrieks (or cry) whenever I go to work. It breaks my heart every time when I leave her in company of my brothers.

Below are some of her pictures taken with Nikon D90. It's hard to capture her movement since she is so active. Nevertheless, with lots of adjustments on the camera I was able to take some pictures. Still amateur here so a little kind criticism is very much appreciated.

I think these pictures tells how much Potchi and I bonded. No need to express how much I love the little princess. I spoil her and rightfully so as she is my happiness these days.

To my best friend, know that I will always be here for you as you have been for me.